"The Missing Link"

by W.R.T., ‘96

Found in The McMicken Review, Vol. IX, No. 7, March 1895

I think I’ve found the missing link

     That Darwin sought in vain;

I’ve found it in a curious man

     That comes from sunny Spain.

Although a man, each several part

     Is like a different beast;

So that you’d know this man had been

     From many animals pieced.

His nose is pug, his voice is hoarse,

     And all his locks are hare;

The fellow has a lion tongue;

     Besides, his head is bare.

He is a man with raven mind,

     And both his legs have calves;

His slender limbs so taper are

     You’d think they were but haves.

If you’ll attend me, you will find

     His family are queer;

His children are two little kids;

     His sister is a dear;

His father is a mean old pug,

     Who’s ever saying “neigh”;

His mother is a silly goose;

     His brother is a jay.